Galatians 6:9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
This year, God has really worked on making me more patient as we go through this adoption process. You ask for patience and you will receive. He will give you ways to work on becoming more patient. It has been 10 months since we went to our first adoption meeting and we were finally told we were certified adoptive parents in March. Starting the next week, we put in an interest on a 10 year old girl. The next week, we put an interest on a 9 year old boy and a 11 year old girl, because we were told to put an interest on as many children as we liked. Two weeks ago, I was told by the first child's caseworker that they would be making their decision the next week and they would definitely let us know either way. Well, it's 4 weeks in and we have not heard anything about any of the children. We were hoping to know something about one of the 3 children before our first match party, which happens to be tomorrow 4 hours away.
I have been asked if that means we will be getting 3 children. No, it means we are interested in these 3. Once we are chosen for one, our interest on the others will go away. Again, we will have to be patient as we wait to see if one of these are the one God wanted for us.
We will be attending our first match party tomorrow at a church, where we will meet children of all ages. This seems a little odd, like the children are on showcase, but we have heard how many families actually make a match this way. We will get to interact with all of the children to see if there is a match between us.
People keep asking me, "How are you so patient waiting this long?" I have to tell you that I do not always feel patient. I want it to happen quicker and I want to know which one God wants for our family, but things don't happen in our timing, they happen in God's timing. This has been a great lesson for me. God is our everything. He will supply what we need when we need it. I have to continuously turn to God for peace and patience during this time. And he has continuosly given it to me. He shows me that he is in control and will reveal the one for us soon and it may not be the one we want. I know that He is preparing both our family and the child right now as I write. He is preparing our hearts and our lives for each other.
I think of a beautiful blooming garden when I think of patience. Plants start off as seeds and it takes weeks to grow into tiny little plants. Then months as we wait for them to mature and bloom.We have to be patient waiting for each plant to fully develop. In the end, it is all worth it as the vibrant flowers blossom so we can now enjoy the beauty. Adoption is much like this. He is working on us and preparing us as we wait. In the end, we will have the beautiful child He wants us to love and take care of.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Monday, April 2, 2012
Process of picking out the child
Now that we are officially certified adoptive parents, we can start to pick out the children! We started out wanting a boy and girl sibling group and then just one girl. We found a 10 year old girl we are interested in and we asked to be considered for her about a week ago. Then, yesterday, my hubby was interested in a sibling group of 3 girls. So funny, because my hubby was so set on just adding one to our family. Now, he is looking at adding 3! Shocking, but so sweet! He told me that if he could protect 3 girls from continuuing to get abused, then he would do it. But, we found out one of the girls has special needs. We're not sure if our family can handle that. We will just have to continue to pray. It's funny that I have seen so many adoptive families start off with wanting something specific only to end up adopting something totally different. You never know what the Lord has in mind.
This is how the process works from here on out. I am writing this post because we were told something totally different in the beginning. 6 months later, we were finally told how the process works. First, we look through the pages of children online or through emails sent to us. As a family, we pick out who we might be interested in. We see a short description of the child including: emotional, physical, and developmental needs. That's it. So, we pick out the child or children and put in a request to be considered for those children.
Next, the child's case worker looks through our applications to see which 3 families are the best choice for this child. Yes, can you believe there are more than 3 families. Each family in Texas has their own adoption worker. Now, each adoption worker from those 3 families plus the child's case worker get together to determine which family should be chosen.
Once they determine the top family, that family gets a folder of the child's entire life - what they know of him or her. Wow, you find out everything about the child including what kind of abuse they experienced! Then, after all that, the family decides if they are still interested. If they are interested, they set up a meeting date with the child and the adoptive family. If the family is not interested, they move onto another child and the process starts all over again.
I don't know about you, but that is one long process just to find out more information on a child. It seems like they could come up with an alternative process? Seems like more work for the workers than necessary.
This is how the process works from here on out. I am writing this post because we were told something totally different in the beginning. 6 months later, we were finally told how the process works. First, we look through the pages of children online or through emails sent to us. As a family, we pick out who we might be interested in. We see a short description of the child including: emotional, physical, and developmental needs. That's it. So, we pick out the child or children and put in a request to be considered for those children.
Next, the child's case worker looks through our applications to see which 3 families are the best choice for this child. Yes, can you believe there are more than 3 families. Each family in Texas has their own adoption worker. Now, each adoption worker from those 3 families plus the child's case worker get together to determine which family should be chosen.
Once they determine the top family, that family gets a folder of the child's entire life - what they know of him or her. Wow, you find out everything about the child including what kind of abuse they experienced! Then, after all that, the family decides if they are still interested. If they are interested, they set up a meeting date with the child and the adoptive family. If the family is not interested, they move onto another child and the process starts all over again.
I don't know about you, but that is one long process just to find out more information on a child. It seems like they could come up with an alternative process? Seems like more work for the workers than necessary.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
We are officially certified adoptive parents!
Hello friends, I just wanted to share an exciting piece of news that we have been waiting to hear! This afternoon as I was in the middle of spring cleaning and teaching my children, we finally got the word that we are official certified adoptive parents. I can't believe it is finally happening. Since it has taken so long, I have tried not to think about it as much. Believe me, it is always in the back of my mind. We kept picking out children and feeling they were the ones only to find they had disappeared from the website the next week. We are excited about the next step; the most important step of picking out our children. Wow! That sounds so crazy to me. Now, we are just going to wait as God shows us which ones to choose. If any of you readers have gone through adoption, how did you know the child was the one for your family? We would love to hear your experiences. And we would appreciate your prayers as we make this huge decision.
Saturday, March 10, 2012
"How do you homeschool?"
I was recently asked again, "How do you do it? I could never homeschool my children." I hear this quite frequently. I believe many are interested in homeschooling but are intimidated by it as well. I have about 5 friends who said this same thing to me and now they are all homeschooling! In the beginning, I did not think I could homeschool either. I was looking forward to educating children with special needs in the public schools and sending my children to school. But soon I started feeling someone ever so gently urging me to homeschool my son. I thought to myself, "What Lord? You want me to do what?" I had always planned to work when my children started school. Isn't that what we're supposed to do? I had felt led to get my degree in special education, so I assumed He wanted me to teach in the schools. Slowly, God started showing me that this was not His plan for our family.
The first thing I noticed was how I felt after coming home from teaching. I was tired, yet I still had to cook, clean, take care of the kids, be a good wifey, and then plan for the next day of work. By the end of the day, I realized I was giving more to the kids at school than I was giving to my own children. I felt my relationships with my husband and children were not as close as they once were.
Next, we started seeing changes in my son. His teacher and I were fairly close and she started telling me how my son was displaying nervous habits, such as biting his nails. Then, he started acting out inappropriately in the classroom. We were shocked and confused by his actions. Later on in the school year, I discovered why. A friend of mine informed me that my son was being bullied. He was being physically bullied by older kids at school and he was not telling us. Because he was being taught not to tattle, he kept this all to himself and in return, started acting out at school. I felt sick when my friend told me this. How could this happen right under my nose? At 5 years old, I felt we were not doing a good job of protecting him. But, I know all things happen for a reason and that God would use these things for the good. I felt He was using these experiences, among other things, to show us what he wanted from us and lead us down the path He was choosing for us.
So, I prayed, prayed, prayed, and spoke with my hubby about the option of homeschooling. We decided that homeschooling our son was what God wanted for our family. Throughout the entire first year, I thought, "Lord, do you want me to homeschool for just this one year?" As the year progressed and I started teaching my daughter as well, I felt God showing me why He wanted me home with my children. Our family and spiritual relationships started growing closer. We were having fun learning together and we seemed to have more time to do things we had never done before. As a homeschool mom, I started learning more than I had ever learned. I really started to get excited about planning and starting the next school year. We moved to a new place and started actively getting involved with a terrific homeschool group. I had been creating my own curriculum the first year and then started with unit studies the second year. I started experimenting with different curriculums from that point on. Things were going great. And with every passing year, I was realizing all of the benefits and could not imagine them ever going to school. Every year, we do ask our children if they want to continue to homeschool, but in the end, it is our final decision. We're not sure if God will have us homeschool our children through high school, so we just take it one year at a time - allowing God to lead the way.
I believe homeschooling is a calling from the Lord. If you are feeling that gentle nudge like I did 6 years ago, listen - really listen, pray, and spend time with God. Let Him decide if this is what He wants for your family. If it is truly God's will, then He will show you and direct your steps. You may feel overwhelmed and unsure of your abilities. I personally do not feel you need to be a teacher to teach your children; you know your child better than anyone else. I am in awe everyday that He trust me to teach His precious children. Now, I am not saying that it will be easy and your kids will be perfect little angels, because our family is far from perfect. I am telling you that God will help you through it if you ask and if this is His plan for your family. Be patient and don't have high expectations of yourself your first year of homeschooling. Enjoy your little ones while they're little. Start researching homeschooling and find a support group within your area. Attend a homeschool meeting even if you are not currently homeschooling, go to one and chat with the moms and ask questions. You may find yourself homeschooling very soon and loving it! If you have any questions or comments, I would love to hear or help in any way I can. We want to bless others as we have been blessed. Blessings!
The first thing I noticed was how I felt after coming home from teaching. I was tired, yet I still had to cook, clean, take care of the kids, be a good wifey, and then plan for the next day of work. By the end of the day, I realized I was giving more to the kids at school than I was giving to my own children. I felt my relationships with my husband and children were not as close as they once were.
Next, we started seeing changes in my son. His teacher and I were fairly close and she started telling me how my son was displaying nervous habits, such as biting his nails. Then, he started acting out inappropriately in the classroom. We were shocked and confused by his actions. Later on in the school year, I discovered why. A friend of mine informed me that my son was being bullied. He was being physically bullied by older kids at school and he was not telling us. Because he was being taught not to tattle, he kept this all to himself and in return, started acting out at school. I felt sick when my friend told me this. How could this happen right under my nose? At 5 years old, I felt we were not doing a good job of protecting him. But, I know all things happen for a reason and that God would use these things for the good. I felt He was using these experiences, among other things, to show us what he wanted from us and lead us down the path He was choosing for us.
So, I prayed, prayed, prayed, and spoke with my hubby about the option of homeschooling. We decided that homeschooling our son was what God wanted for our family. Throughout the entire first year, I thought, "Lord, do you want me to homeschool for just this one year?" As the year progressed and I started teaching my daughter as well, I felt God showing me why He wanted me home with my children. Our family and spiritual relationships started growing closer. We were having fun learning together and we seemed to have more time to do things we had never done before. As a homeschool mom, I started learning more than I had ever learned. I really started to get excited about planning and starting the next school year. We moved to a new place and started actively getting involved with a terrific homeschool group. I had been creating my own curriculum the first year and then started with unit studies the second year. I started experimenting with different curriculums from that point on. Things were going great. And with every passing year, I was realizing all of the benefits and could not imagine them ever going to school. Every year, we do ask our children if they want to continue to homeschool, but in the end, it is our final decision. We're not sure if God will have us homeschool our children through high school, so we just take it one year at a time - allowing God to lead the way.
I believe homeschooling is a calling from the Lord. If you are feeling that gentle nudge like I did 6 years ago, listen - really listen, pray, and spend time with God. Let Him decide if this is what He wants for your family. If it is truly God's will, then He will show you and direct your steps. You may feel overwhelmed and unsure of your abilities. I personally do not feel you need to be a teacher to teach your children; you know your child better than anyone else. I am in awe everyday that He trust me to teach His precious children. Now, I am not saying that it will be easy and your kids will be perfect little angels, because our family is far from perfect. I am telling you that God will help you through it if you ask and if this is His plan for your family. Be patient and don't have high expectations of yourself your first year of homeschooling. Enjoy your little ones while they're little. Start researching homeschooling and find a support group within your area. Attend a homeschool meeting even if you are not currently homeschooling, go to one and chat with the moms and ask questions. You may find yourself homeschooling very soon and loving it! If you have any questions or comments, I would love to hear or help in any way I can. We want to bless others as we have been blessed. Blessings!
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Thinking about Homeschooling?
This is for those of you who want to homeschool but think you can not,
I'm here to tell you that you can! If you accept God's challenge to raise up your children in His ways, He will enable you to do it. We all have our strengths and weaknesses just as teachers in the public school system. As a result, public school teachers collaborate with one another and attend workshops. In homeschooling, we have local support groups and homeschool conventions that will help and encourage us along our journey. As a homeschooler, you will explore different paths, and if it doesn't go where you want it to go, take the lessons learned and try another path.
As a homeschool family, there are various types of resources out there for you including libraries, co-op groups, classes, hundreds of websites, nature centers, museums, and exploring the world. By using these options and creativity, you could entirely homeschool for free if you are willing to do some work. Curriculum ranges in price depending on buying used or new. You can purchase used curriculum and materials on ebay, used homeschool curriculum sites such as http://homeschoolclassifieds.com/, and I personally love attending used curriculum sales. There are homeschooling books such as: 100 Top Picks for Homeschool Curriculum by Cathy Duffy that can help you determine: the best way for your family to homeschool, curriculum options that will best suit your family, and organizational help. Books such as this one can help you determine how much time you want to invest in planning your week or your lessons or if you want your subjects to be more student led or teacher led.
Many parents say to me that they could not handle their children all day long or they don't have the patience. It may be a struggle at first and we all certainly have our days just like any other, but again if you have the desire God will provide for you and your children. There are many benefits to homeschooling. You will have the priveledge of watching your children make discoveries, pursue interests and follow where life leads them. They will get real world socialization, learning how to communicate with people of all ages. Your family relationships and spiritual relationships will grow. You will have many volunteer opportunities to choose from. You will be able to pass on your family's morals and values and minimize the influence of the drug and sex culture. Your children will be exposed to less peer pressure. And time. You will have the time with your child to play a game, cuddle, play, laugh and cry, go for a nature walk, sit and talk, and help build upon their strengths and weaknesses.
Homeschooling is a big commitment, but you have to decide what is more important to you, your family, and to God. You have to make the choice to step out of your comfort zone and trust in Him. You are your child's best advocate! You will be richly rewarded.
I'm here to tell you that you can! If you accept God's challenge to raise up your children in His ways, He will enable you to do it. We all have our strengths and weaknesses just as teachers in the public school system. As a result, public school teachers collaborate with one another and attend workshops. In homeschooling, we have local support groups and homeschool conventions that will help and encourage us along our journey. As a homeschooler, you will explore different paths, and if it doesn't go where you want it to go, take the lessons learned and try another path.
As a homeschool family, there are various types of resources out there for you including libraries, co-op groups, classes, hundreds of websites, nature centers, museums, and exploring the world. By using these options and creativity, you could entirely homeschool for free if you are willing to do some work. Curriculum ranges in price depending on buying used or new. You can purchase used curriculum and materials on ebay, used homeschool curriculum sites such as http://homeschoolclassifieds.com/, and I personally love attending used curriculum sales. There are homeschooling books such as: 100 Top Picks for Homeschool Curriculum by Cathy Duffy that can help you determine: the best way for your family to homeschool, curriculum options that will best suit your family, and organizational help. Books such as this one can help you determine how much time you want to invest in planning your week or your lessons or if you want your subjects to be more student led or teacher led.
Many parents say to me that they could not handle their children all day long or they don't have the patience. It may be a struggle at first and we all certainly have our days just like any other, but again if you have the desire God will provide for you and your children. There are many benefits to homeschooling. You will have the priveledge of watching your children make discoveries, pursue interests and follow where life leads them. They will get real world socialization, learning how to communicate with people of all ages. Your family relationships and spiritual relationships will grow. You will have many volunteer opportunities to choose from. You will be able to pass on your family's morals and values and minimize the influence of the drug and sex culture. Your children will be exposed to less peer pressure. And time. You will have the time with your child to play a game, cuddle, play, laugh and cry, go for a nature walk, sit and talk, and help build upon their strengths and weaknesses.
Homeschooling is a big commitment, but you have to decide what is more important to you, your family, and to God. You have to make the choice to step out of your comfort zone and trust in Him. You are your child's best advocate! You will be richly rewarded.
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